WHY ARE BAD IDEAS SO POPULAR?
HOT DESKING, OR HOW I LEARNED TO LOSE MY DESK AND FIND OBLIVION
The latest craze in workplace nightmares is the ill-conceived notion of "hot-desking". This idea was likely created by someone who had consumed far too many energy drinks while simultaneously facebooking, instagraming, tweeting, and pinning at their job as a workplace design consultant for a major internet entity whose name we cannot divulge (lest our Blogger privileges be withheld). Despite the litter of empty energy drink cans and twizzler wrappers surrounding the consultant's desk, functioning as a literal barricade, they decided that it would be a great idea for everyone else NOT to have a "special" place to call their own when they came to work.
This would mean that every day, people would arrive at work and have to find a new place to sit, selected from among the anonymous "open seating" workstations that offered no privacy, or ability to personalize the workspace. It would be like the game of "cake walk" played as a child, especially if the number of seats was slightly underestimated (on purpose). Oh how fun! Watch the distress as people pick their way among the purposely disordered "stations", carrying their meager personal possessions in backpacks, like refugees from a natural disaster, looking for a safe haven in an unwelcoming environment. Once seated at the anonymized work station, the newly ensconced worker cannot afford much time to adjust things like chair settings or monitor height, as this would subtract from their ability to produce the expected amount of work. By the end of the long workday spent staring at the glowing screen in front of them, without any meaningless breaks that would disrupt the flow, the worker attempts to arise to a standing position, finding their back and neck hurt like the Dickens (the name is not an accident). They gather their few personal items, place them into their backpack, and trudge off to begin their long commute home. The next day, they bring massive noise-cancelling headphones to try to drown out the cacophony of other people's voices, computer keys clicking, and noises of a personal nature they wish they had not heard. They are now more isolated than they were when they actually had a desk of their own, locked into a virtual world of their own music playing through the headphones, the screen in front of them commanding their complete attention. They could be anywhere in this state, and the question arises, why can't they be at home, doing the same thing? Only HR and the consultant know the answer to this question. Control. And guess what? It isn't even a new idea, just an old dysfunctional one, dusted off and brought back to life again.
PROGRESS!
